Oyster Offsets

October 20, 2007

A few evenings ago, John and I went Neptune Oyster for a light meal before a concert. It’s a tiny but charming bistro with marble tabletops, plush red banquettes, and a passive-aggressive but efficient waitstaff.

We perused the oyster menu. I was not born an oyster eater, but they’re in fashion these days, and they regularly find me without me seeking them out. So I have slowly gone from repulsion, to intrigue, to almost — only almost, though — enjoyment.

When I do in fact have a choice, I try to find oysters that taste as little as oysters as possible. The menu described one type as ‘creamy’ with a ‘hint of cucumber’ (for real). I went with that. It was from Washington State.

John was impressed that a little North End bistro could bring to its tables an oyster still fresh after a 3,000-mile journey. “Wow,” he said, “all the way from Washington State!”

All of a sudden, I was not impressed. I felt guilty.

Time to buy a carbon offset. Or maybe the little lychee tree growing in my kitchen window will suffice?

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One Response to “Oyster Offsets”

  1. Emily Says:

    Eww, oysters! Why bother to pay to eat snot when you can just wait for a nice, juicy cold to deliver the same effect directly to the back of your throat? You could even simultaneously suck on a cucumber to infuse it with cucumber flavor. Yum!

    Ha, passive-aggressive waitstaff.

    It was so very great to finally get to hang out for a little while with John. John, you’re a jolly good fellow! And so say all of us. xoxox


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